stress

Just the Numbers

Stress.jpg

Quick Facts About Stress:

➡︎ Americans spend $11.3 billion per year to cope with stress.
➡︎ Over 90% of disease is caused or complicated by stress.
➡︎ Job stress is estimated to cost U.S. industry $300 billion annually.
➡︎ Percentage of adults being treated for depression: 54%.
➡︎ Stress has been linked to all leading causes of death, including heart disease and cancer.
➡︎ Long-term stress is strongly associated with depression, heart disease, and weakened immune system.
➡︎ Up to 60% of employee absences are due to psychological problems such as stress and depression.
➡︎ Estimated percentage of American adults attempting to control stress: 95%

What are your stress level like?

If you need anything, just email me. I’m always here to help.

Hard to Reach Success

Let me ask you something. What would you say is the one thing holding you back from your success? You know. What is the one thing you feel you need to make success happen? Think about it for a minute.

Is it more time? What about more money? Maybe your one thing is someone who supports your efforts. Well, listen up.

As hard as this is to hear, you've got to find a way to get around it. For starters, you could work around this by adjusting the steps you're taking. In other words, if money is short right now, figure out what else you can do (toward your goal) until the money situation improves.

Need more time? Try to stop worrying about time. Instead, start prioritizing what's important to you. Example? If you want to succeed at losing weight, make time to walk. Even if it's only 10 minutes. Get walking.

This formula works. And here's why. It works because for every step you take, you are experiencing immediate success. Bottom line: Don't ever allow that one thing to stop you from succeeding.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

3 Remedies to Move Forward

Here's a question I want you to think about: What makes your day difficult? In other words, on a very basic level, what keeps you from doing what you need to do?

I realize that every day is different and that each day comes with its share of difficulties, but I want you to focus on the difficulty (difficulties) that seem to run through most days.

As you answer this question, is there a pattern? Is it lack of time? No help from others? An overall sense of stress? An inability to stay on track? Money shortage? 

Or, did you notice that there is no pattern? Meaning, you seem to always just end up at the close of another day thinking, "What the heck happened?" (When my days end that way, I feel like a hot mess.) 

Pattern or no pattern, daily difficulties happen. And, it's your daily difficulties that can keep you stuck. You're stuck because you keep staring at the same problems over and over and over like you glare at a bright, shiny object.

I like to describe this as being 'transfixed'. And, while being transfixed can feel like you're moving in the right direction of overcoming the difficulty and moving on, the opposite is happening. The truth is, you're actually stuck. 

And why are you stuck? Because when you're transfixed, everything else gets blocked out. You can't see answers. You can't see solutions. You can't hear someone's encouragement. You can't think anything else. You only see the difficulty.

Here's how to remedy being stuck:
1)  Realize when you're in the trance
2)  Break the trance by focusing elsewhere
3)  Look for (another) solution

You're probably wondering how you do that? Well, the answer is so simple! For example, let's say you're at your desk and in your mind you're freaking out over how little time you have to finish your report. 

It's then -- in that moment -- that you recognize that (1) You're transfixed on the stress of having little time. (2) You break the trance by telling yourself, "If I'm short time, me worrying about lack of time takes precious time from completing my project. (3) I will focus, now, back on finishing my project."

I know you're probably thinking, well that won't work. But, trust me, it works. Try it. The next time you're in the middle of your difficulty I recommend you realize it, break it, and apply a solution. 

So, what do you do if you can't find (another) solution? Well, don't worry about that. At least you broke the trance and you don't feel stuck. And that's a great feeling right there.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

Why Goals Matter

Having a horrible day explains it all. Nothing got done. Things got done, but, not the right things. What you got done didn't feel satisfying enough. Yes, you got stuff done -- but -- you still have tons more to do.

When you feel like your need to do is unending, check and see if what you're doing provides you with any satisfaction. If it does, get back to what you were doing. Just know that you're on your way to completing something that will make you happy.

If what you're doing feels draining and stressful because you never get to do the things you really want to do -- just for you -- I suggest your change that. Ultimately, your life must include those personal and professional goals that keep you loving your life.

Ultimately, you'll want to ask yourself, "What am I not doing that will make me happy?" When you have the answer to that, do that. This won't be easy to do, but start today for a happier tomorrow.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

3 Ways to Move Forward

Ongoing stress will squash every ounce of joy and happiness from you and leave you depleted, exhausted, and defeated. Stop stress from running and ruining your life.

#1  One way to make that happen is to release those things that keep you tied to a past that is no longer serving you. An example would be old tapes of something that happened in your childhood.

#2  Another way to make that happen is to decide to move forward. Sounds easy, right? It's not. Trust me, making a decision then moving forward can sometimes take all your willpower and then some.

#3  The last way to move forward is to stay just where you're at. Don't fret another minute about it. Maybe it's not time to make that decision. Maybe it's not time to leave where you're at.

The bottom line is whether you release it, decide to move forward, or just stay where you're at, the very fact that you're thinking about it is a good sign. That's because being stuck isn't a place you want to be in. You always want to be moving forward.

Gentle reminder
Please feel free to leave a comment about today's post in the comment box below. If you want your comment to be between just you and me, just email me. (I receive many of these per week--and that works fine for me). Either way, I'm always here to help.

Feeling Heavy

Happiness seeps in when you least expect it. It's slow. That's because happiness accumulates like random coins being thrown in a jar. Overtime, it fills up. It gets heavy. Which is what being grounded feels like. And, that is why stressful moments don't buckle you. You handle it. You are clearly centered and completely full of happiness.

Gentle reminder
Please feel free to leave a comment about today's post in the comment box below. If you want your comment to be between just you and me, just email me. (I receive many of these per week--and that works fine for me). Either way, I'm always here to help.

8 Dangers of Stress

Stress can keep you from living the life you were meant to live because when stress consumes you, it becomes your focus.  And, the more you focus on stress, the worse it gets.

8 Quick Facts About Stress
Americans spend $11.3 billion per year to cope with stress.
Over 90% of disease is caused or complicated by stress.
Job stress is estimated to cost U.S. industry $300 billion annually.
Percentage of adults being treated for depression:  54%.
Stress has been linked to all leading causes of death, including heart disease and cancer.
Long-term stress is associated with depression, heart disease, and weakened immune system.
Up to 60% of employee absences are due to psychological problems like stress and depression.
Estimated percentage of American adults attempting to control stress:  95%.

Two Secrets to Overcoming Stress
Secret #1: The more you focus on what you can’t control, the worse it gets.  Think of yourself dealing with a ticket agent at the airport.  Your flight has been delayed.  You are so upset you yell and shout at the man at the counter. 

You know this is not helping, and, it’s actually making matters worse.  Not only are you stressing yourself out, but also, that employee you’re yelling at is in a position to help you.

Secret #2: The more your focus on what you can control, the less the things that do bother you actually do bother you.  Does that make sense?  Here’s an example.  I work out on a treadmill and totally zone out so the time goes by faster.  Once in a while, I have someone on the treadmill next to me who flips through his or her magazine like a maniac.  It drives me nuts and I find it distracting.  I make myself focus on something—anything other than my neighbor.  This tip on how to control your thoughts can help lower your stress because it is easy to do, it’s immediate, and it can work in so many situations.

Two Control Groups
When it comes to handling stress, people can fit into one of two groups: 

Group #1: The first group of people is constantly trying to control things they cannot control.  In dealing with life and their relationships, they feel like a victim, hopeless, and helpless. 

Group #2: The second group of people is aware of what they can and cannot control.  They experience an event, think about what it is that want to do about it, and do what needs to be done to handle the situation.

Three Key Areas for Stress
There are three key areas in your life that can create stress:  home, work, and money.  When one area gets out of balance, it can infect all areas because stress is contagious.  When two or more areas are affected at the same time, it can be disastrous.  For instance, you lose your job and get behind on paying your bills.

3 Action Steps
#1  Draw a large circle with a small circle in the middle.  Break the circle up into three sections:  home, work, and money.  Now, imagine getting stressed and all that stress flowing to the middle circle.  Pretty soon, that middle circle will fill up with your stress and start flowing back out to the three areas of your life. 

#2  Realize what is happening—that your stress in one area of your life is spilling over into and affecting the other two areas.   Stop this from happening.  Get rid of the circle.  Look at the three areas of your life like the front window of your car.  (Sorry, I couldn’t think of a better example.) Draw the rectangle shape and break the shape into your three sections:  home, work, and money.

#3  Begin identifying what’s stressing you out, isolate it by putting it into one of your three sections, and then decide if it’s something you can or cannot control.  If you can control it, try.  If you can’t control it, accept what is happening and change your focus to something you can control. 

Bottom line 
It's your thoughts that's triggering your emotions. When your stressed, figure out what thought you're thinking, and do a rethink. Meaning, decide to think of something else.

Gentle reminder
Please feel free to leave a comment about today's post in the comment box below. If want your comment to be between just you and me, just email me. (I receive many of these per week--and that works fine for me). Either way, I'm always here to help.

 

2 Kinds of Mornings

Morning #1: A hot mess!
You wake up late. Turning to shut the snooze alarm, you pull your shoulder. While walking to the bathroom, the bathroom door hits your pulled shoulder. You wait for warm water, but it never comes so you wash you face quickly in cold water.

As you fix breakfast, warm up your car, drive to work you're noticing how many little itty bitty things are going wrong. Every light is turning yellow, burnt toast, coffee spilled on your pants. 

The problem with Morning #1 is that your day never really improves as the day goes on. Oh, it might a little, but mostly your day stays a hot mess until your head hits the pillow that night.

Morning #2: A hot sexy mess!
You wake up before your alarm and turn on some soothing music. Moving smoothly to the bathroom, you turn on the water and it gets hot immediately. As you run that wonderful water over your face, you glance at yourself in the bathroom mirror. You look and feel beautifully rested. 

Breakfast is full of protein, your car feels clean inside, and your favorite parking place is available so you make it to work right on time.

How to Deal With Morning #1
The happier you are (about your life), the less Morning #1 bothers you. I know burnt toast isn't what you want, but burnt toast it is. (It's times like this that I wish I had you sitting in front of me. I have an awesome chart that explains this. It's a little tricker on paper.)

I have told you — in so many of my posts — that the best way to deal with life's challenges is to accept it. Let me give you a great example.

You're in the middle of a Morning #1 — but now it's around 5 p.m (and you're still having a bad day). You go to the market to buy some groceries. When you go to grab a grocery cart, two carts are pushed together. So you fight, pull, and jerk uncontrollably trying with all your might to make those two carts come apart. 

Remedy
Let go of the carts! Calm down. Look around, and find another cart. Meaning: Accept your day just as it is. Allow all the hot mess to show itself. It's when you're in control (of you) will things stop happening. In fact, they vanish.

If you need anything, just email me. I am always here to help. ⚅⚄

To Go Beyond

Just surviving can really get to a person. Not enough money. Not enough time. Not enough happiness. And when you feel like your barely surviving, life can be downright unbearable. Either way, life feels difficult.

Of course, not everyone feels that way, but a lot of people I come in contact with do. They tell me it feels like there is some super unknown crazy force keeping them from moving forward. They want to move forward but feel they can't. 

I've got a remedy for that but I'm not sure you're going to like it. 

I suggest you give in. Meaning, go do something. Anything. Make yourself stop thinking about it. Walk. Get coffee. Veg out. But give yourself a much needed break from the stress of it all. And if you can do that, you might begin feeling a small glimmer of hope. 

Not the type of hope that you'll win the Lotto. But rather the type of hope that helps you to keep going. Regardless of fear. In the face of doubt. And still knowing that you don't really know how to get out of survival mode.

In a state of hope much good happens. You smile. You sleep better. You have more energy. You're more open. You begin to see new possibilities. You realize that there's a lot of people who have it much worse than you do.

My point is this. Don't give up. Decide to see yourself as in a much better place than just surviving. You're on your way to thriving. And once you're thriving, you'll soar. Soaring is effortless. No fear. You're now living life to it fullest.  

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help. ⚅⚄