focus

That One Thing

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Let me ask you something. What would you say is the one thing holding you back from your success? You know. What is the one thing you feel you need to make success happen? Think about it for a minute.

Is it more time? What about more money? Maybe your one thing is someone who supports your efforts. Well, listen up. As hard as this is to hear, you've got to find a way to get around it.

For starters, you could work around this by adjusting the steps you're taking. In other words, if money is short right now, figure out what else you can do (toward your goal) until the money situation improves.

Need more time? Try to stop worrying about time. Instead, start prioritizing what's important to you. Example? If you want to succeed at losing weight, make time to walk. Even if it's only 10 minutes. Get walking.

This formula works. And here's why. It works because for every step you take, you’re experiencing immediate success.

If you need anything, just email me. I’m always here to help.

Don't ever allow that one thing
stop you from succeeding.

Be Carried Away

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'Drift time' is when you’re no longer focused on what you are doing. When you are in drift time, you check email, watch a video, or engage in any behavior that distracts you from completing projects.

Drift time is terrific when it is used properly. Everyone needs a break now and then. Be aware, though, of interruptions that suck up valuable time and keep you from finishing your projects. I think it’s all about balance. You know, some work, some play.

If you need anything, just email me. I’m always here to help.

The Most Important Tool

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If you want to accomplish, succeed, develop, grow, change, deliver, achieve, manifest, or collect, the one tool you need to do that is focus. Focus is a game changer. And — it would be fair to say — that without focus, not much happens.

Here are some focus tips you might find helpful. (I use these and so do my coaching clients.)

HOW TO FOCUS

  • At first, don’t try to focus. Just implement ways to improve your focus.

  • Look closely at your distractions, and figure out why you’re distracted by them.

  • Determine (the night before) what one item to focus on first thing in the morning.

  • If you simply cannot make yourself focus, you might just need a break.

  • Know that for every minute of focus, you’re moving forward on your goal.

If you can master focus, I promise that you will accomplish, succeed, develop, grow, change, deliver, achieve, manifest, or collect what it is you want.

If you need anything, just email me. I’m always here to help.

Change Is Strange

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If you want to feel your most excited — or your most challenged — just throw change in the mix. I know you already know this, but, change is necessary because it’s a huge part of you evolving as a person. But, IMHO, it’s the hardest part.

For me personally, the thing I WAS able to change, made me feel worse not better. For example, writing my first book. When I tossed the completed manuscript on my coffee table, I almost threw up. My discomfort with that level of success was palatable.

As a former corporate trainer, I would turn down speaking requests if the client wanted me to teach ‘Change’. Now that I work with women entrepreneurs, change is our first focus. Again, it’s not easy, but it’s where you’ve got to start.

How about you? Have you identified something you need to change, but can’t seem to get over the discomfort of change? If you do, I have a quick hack for that. View that feeling as fear (fear is the mother of all dream crushers). Say to yourself, “I feel weird, but I’ll do it anyway”


“Change isn’t the hard part. Getting over the funky
feeling change creates is the hard part.” —Sandra Smith

If you need anything, just email me. I’m always here to help.

3 Battles That Rule Your World

Where's your battle? Is it what you focus on? Is it the meaning you give to what you're focusing on? Or, is it the action you take after all that? If you're not sure if you know the answer, you're not alone. That's because it takes a high level of self-awareness to know the answer. Let me explain.

What You Focus On
People always have the choice to focus on what they can control or what they can't control. But, every focus you take, creates a feeling. Here's an example: You go to work and feel because a customer yelled at you that you're not respected.

This is an example of something you cannot control. If you continue to focus on that event over and over (after it's over), your become upset (a negative emotion). And even though you're home and eating a wonderful meal your daughter cooked, you're still upset.

What Does It Mean
Not feeling respected because a stranger (the customer) yelled at you could be true, or not be true. But, you have the choice to put what meaning you want to about the event. One choice is to say the woman yelled, you can't control that, you're doing your job, and you hope her day gets better!

Another choice is to internalize her mean words, experience them on a personal level, and get upset. Whether you're right or not, you've decided that her yelling at you means she doesn't respect you.

What Action Will You Take
After the yelling incident, one action you could take is yell at the next customer you talk to (because you're so upset). Another action you could take is to call your daughter and tell her you're looking forward to her wonderful dinner she has planned. 

The Bottom Line
Begin today to become aware of what you focus on, what meaning you give to it, and what action follows. Remember, you always have a choice to focus on what you can and can't control. And true happiness comes when you stop trying to control things you can't control.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

8 Dangers of Stress

Stress can keep you from living the life you were meant to live because when stress consumes you, it becomes your focus.  And, the more you focus on stress, the worse it gets.

8 Quick Facts About Stress
Americans spend $11.3 billion per year to cope with stress.
Over 90% of disease is caused or complicated by stress.
Job stress is estimated to cost U.S. industry $300 billion annually.
Percentage of adults being treated for depression:  54%.
Stress has been linked to all leading causes of death, including heart disease and cancer.
Long-term stress is associated with depression, heart disease, and weakened immune system.
Up to 60% of employee absences are due to psychological problems like stress and depression.
Estimated percentage of American adults attempting to control stress:  95%.

Two Secrets to Overcoming Stress
Secret #1: The more you focus on what you can’t control, the worse it gets.  Think of yourself dealing with a ticket agent at the airport.  Your flight has been delayed.  You are so upset you yell and shout at the man at the counter. 

You know this is not helping, and, it’s actually making matters worse.  Not only are you stressing yourself out, but also, that employee you’re yelling at is in a position to help you.

Secret #2: The more your focus on what you can control, the less the things that do bother you actually do bother you.  Does that make sense?  Here’s an example.  I work out on a treadmill and totally zone out so the time goes by faster.  Once in a while, I have someone on the treadmill next to me who flips through his or her magazine like a maniac.  It drives me nuts and I find it distracting.  I make myself focus on something—anything other than my neighbor.  This tip on how to control your thoughts can help lower your stress because it is easy to do, it’s immediate, and it can work in so many situations.

Two Control Groups
When it comes to handling stress, people can fit into one of two groups: 

Group #1: The first group of people is constantly trying to control things they cannot control.  In dealing with life and their relationships, they feel like a victim, hopeless, and helpless. 

Group #2: The second group of people is aware of what they can and cannot control.  They experience an event, think about what it is that want to do about it, and do what needs to be done to handle the situation.

Three Key Areas for Stress
There are three key areas in your life that can create stress:  home, work, and money.  When one area gets out of balance, it can infect all areas because stress is contagious.  When two or more areas are affected at the same time, it can be disastrous.  For instance, you lose your job and get behind on paying your bills.

3 Action Steps
#1  Draw a large circle with a small circle in the middle.  Break the circle up into three sections:  home, work, and money.  Now, imagine getting stressed and all that stress flowing to the middle circle.  Pretty soon, that middle circle will fill up with your stress and start flowing back out to the three areas of your life. 

#2  Realize what is happening—that your stress in one area of your life is spilling over into and affecting the other two areas.   Stop this from happening.  Get rid of the circle.  Look at the three areas of your life like the front window of your car.  (Sorry, I couldn’t think of a better example.) Draw the rectangle shape and break the shape into your three sections:  home, work, and money.

#3  Begin identifying what’s stressing you out, isolate it by putting it into one of your three sections, and then decide if it’s something you can or cannot control.  If you can control it, try.  If you can’t control it, accept what is happening and change your focus to something you can control. 

Bottom line 
It's your thoughts that's triggering your emotions. When your stressed, figure out what thought you're thinking, and do a rethink. Meaning, decide to think of something else.

Gentle reminder
Please feel free to leave a comment about today's post in the comment box below. If want your comment to be between just you and me, just email me. (I receive many of these per week--and that works fine for me). Either way, I'm always here to help.

 

The Center of Activity

How do you begin your day? Do your feet hit the ground and off you go? Do you grab your iPad or your iPhone? Maybe you just wander around your house trying to enjoy a cup of coffee. The fact is, the morning is really important. The right kind of morning sets the tone for the whole day. I've learned the power of this and read the Masters for about an hour every morning. Why? Because it gives me strength. It gives me focus. It helps me see what's possible for my life. I recommend you pay attention to what your mornings are like, and see if you can change some things. Even if it's only for 15 minutes. All those 15 minutes add up over time.