Personal Growth

Don't Ask

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If you follow my blog, you know that I sometimes share with you conversations I have with complete strangers while flying for work. Well, I’ve got a new one for you.

This woman (I’ll name Trish) was really interesting. She was full of energy, but tired. Smart, but talked in circles. Kind, but only talked about her troubles. She seems stressed, uneasy, and depleted.

She voiced her concern about lack of money, lack of time, and too much to do. She was successful, but felt like a failure. Just hearing her question her every move was exhausting.

The only time she actually stopped talking about all her issues was when our flight attendant served us snacks and a drink.

As she’s spilling her drink down the front of her top, and trying to eat her snack quickly, she stopped and asked me, “I’m curious. What do you think I’m not dealing with?”

First of all, that was such an awesome question. I mean, honestly, how many people choose to look at an issue that way?

I replied, “You know what, I feel bad for what you’re going through, but, I don’t think my opinion really matters.” She said, “I agree, your opinion doesn’t really matter, but can you tell me anyway?”

I paused a minute, looked at her, then said slowly, “You’re in need of control.”

She turned her head to look the other way, and never said another word to me for the rest of our trip.

If you need anything, just email me. I’m always here to help.

Things Seem Vague

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Having doubts about your ability to make something happen (or change something), derails the full use of your potential. I feel like a broken record when I advise, "You must believe — through self-efficacy — that you can reach your goals." 

Before you go, I need to ask you for a favor. We're growing like crazy over here at Aspire Seminars (my company). We're looking to add team players to handle VA work, marketing, and social media. If you know of someone, please have them email me at sandra@sandrasmith.com, and I'll give them more info about what we're up to. Thanks so much!

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

Self Habits

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Time management isn't about time. Time management is all about self-management. In other words, know what's most important to you, and do that first. 

Also, get good at recognizing those habits that are unproductive, and end up wasting your valuable time.  

When you find yourself engaged in an activity that is nothing more than a diversion, tell yourself, "Get back to what's important." This is a valuable message for anyone wanting to complete a goal, or move forward in life.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

Important Voice Message

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As soon as you wake up tomorrow, play a voice message you recorded on your phone the night before that says, "Keep your eyes open today. Something good may happen to you between 8:00 a.m. and 9:00 p.m. Be ready for it."

You might be thinking that you're just not that lucky. Things don't work that for you. But, here's the deal. Unless you think it, and plan for it, and look for it, luck is hard to find. And luck, is a big, fat kiss from the Universe.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

Reaching a Goal

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Are you picking stuff or is it picking you? In other words, do you get up deciding how you want your day to go down? Or, does it just happen?

And, when your head hits the pillow at night, what is your answer to the question, "What happened — today — that got me closer to my goal?"

If your answer is 'nothing', things need to change. Living by default will catch up with you. It's called regret.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

Quality of Life

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I was heading home on a short flight from Eugene, OR to Seattle, WA yesterday evening. I sat next to a woman wearing big boots and worn jeans. Her name was Julie, and she's a physical therapist. She works on humans and horses.

We talked nutrition, nature, gardening, and all things healthy. Her job is to treat people (and horses), and make them better. So, I asked her, "Julie, if you could pick one thing someone could do that would keep them healthy, what would that be?"

Her answer was, "Motion is lotion." 

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

Feeling Discomfort

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Do you have a discomfort robbing you of your growth and happiness? If you're not sure, here are some examples straight from my clients:

* You have your own business—and must sell your products and services—but you're not comfortable selling so you don't. And, you not selling is having a negative affect on your self-image and your finances.
* You manage people, but you're uncomfortable addressing a problem with an employee, so you don't. Now staff respects you less, and you experience low self-worth. 
*  You feel really uncomfortable networking—so you avoid a scheduled networking event—where you know your ideal clients hang out. You haven't booked a new client in six months, and your income is taking a dive.

The remedy? A strong self-image. Your self-image helps you ask for the sale, address a problem with an employee, and talk to strangers at a networking event. Bottom line: Your self-image determines your growth and happiness.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

Think for Yourself

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This is a gentle reminder: become your own authority. I know that sounds like something a professional speaker would say to an audience, but it's still true. Labels can help you find the group you relate to the most. And, labels can keep you shut in with the group that isn't really your match.

So, like we say...you must become your own authority. To put it another way, be you. Follow your intuition. Do your own research. Listen to the advice that'll serve you best. Because in the long run, you're responsible with the enormous task of you living the life you're meant to live.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

Perfect Rules

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Do you worry? No. I mean, do you worry about being perfect? Unfortunately, being perfect can cost you in terms of mental health, relationships, and productivity. And, more often than not, perfectionism is the cornerstone of fear of failure.  

To put it another way, a person's drive to be perfect
actually creates fear, and that can lead to failure.
 

If this is you, stop wasting energy beating yourself up about it. Achieve what you can, when you can, then simply learn from the experience and move on. I sure made that sound simple, right? But it's not. Far from it. Allowing yourself to do—even if it doesn't feel perfect—is the very thing a perfectionist avoids.

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.

Stop You in Your Tracks

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Giving yourself permission to go for what you really want isn't always easy. Feeling undeserving, unworthy, or selfish can get in the way. Remember, though, you're not really those things, but rather, those things are nothing more than negative self beliefs.

Unfortunately, negative self beliefs can stop you in your tracks, and keep you from moving forward. So, think about this: Do you fully give yourself permission to live the life you really want?

If you need anything, just email me. I'm always here to help.