Are your actions, feelings, and ideas a reaction to others—rather than a reflection of you? If your answer is yes, read on. You might be surprised what you uncover.
In Born to Please, Karen Blaker, Ph.D., writes about being a Me Phobic. This is someone who has an irrational fear of looking at herself and getting to know herself; someone who doesn’t know what is means to honor himself; someone who defines herself by and through the approval of others.
A Me Phobic focuses on gaining approval from others. Approval, to them, equals love. And, they are motivated by fear (fear of punishment, abandonment, rejection, or being alone.) Their fear has the power to keep them stuck and unable to move forward on their dreams.
A Me Phobic believes that, “If I am sensitive and pleasing enough to others, they will love me and that love will nurture me and make me feel good about myself.” Can you see how looking for self-love—outside of you—can create a vicious cycle?
Believing in yourself is crucial for you to find your path and create a beautiful life. To do this, you must motivate yourself with positive self-talk, rational beliefs, and positive thoughts. This is not easy to do, but with practice, it can become a habit.
As always, if you need anything, just ask. I'm always here to help.